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Vultures of Horror 2 (GAM051)
Vultures of Horror 2 (also known as Sacrifice of Vulture 2) is a movie about, um… nothing happens. It's about nothing! It's the Seinfeld of Nigerian movies. It's ridicu—they might as well just show us a table read, and that would be the whole thing. "What's the deal with Vultures of Horror?I guess we'll find out in the next movie because this one has no plot!' It's terrible. "Maybe something happens to the Vultures of Horror… No! No! Nothing happens!" That's the movie. Type: Supernatural) Opening Phrase Where each week we watch another selection from Christian cinema, because the grocery store was fresh out of the spiked angle things from The DaVinci Code. How Bad Was It? Well, if you loved the first Vultures of Horror, but you thought to yourself "Dammit, there's too few characters, and all this CGI is the devil!", then you will love this movie. It's two scenes that happen over and over again, for almost exactly an hour. It's the Waiting for Vultures—it's Waiting for Godot, but vultures. Best Worst *Eli: …being able to understand people who's first language is English. *Heath: ...second best-worst subtitles having them Notes *This episode was originally supposed to be of What the Bleep Do We Know!? with special guest Yvette d'Entremont, but audio issues made the her recording unusable. *Since Vultures of Horror is now only available as a full length movie instead of two shorts, this review covers from roughly 55:02 onward. For the first half, see Vultures of Horror 1, and for the next installment, see Wicked Vultures 1. Jokes *She also says 'Don't forget to testify what the Lord has done for you.' And I just want to point out that it becomes very very clear, if it wasn't clear already, that the Christian God in this movie is just one of many competing deities. These people are basically just showing us My God Can Beat Up Your God: The Contest. That is definitely not the one and only God we're used to seeing in Christan films—they're just proposing that Christ is a slightly stronger demon god that works in mysterious ways." (29:10) *"And his wife is calling to say she has a headache—she thinks she's getting malaria. Malaria! Who sends a text message about… really? Just stop Instagramming about it and go to the hospital. You have malaria? Why did you Tweet me? Look, I get the flu occasionally—I mean less, actually honestly, because flus are really just your body having an allergic reaction to eggs, so don't worry about it, but like I don't want to talk about it right now—but the truth is when I get a flu, I don't call my fiance and tell her I think I'm getting malaria. Now look, okay, if you're in Nigeria, malaria is really a thing. You know, in the US, tee hee malaria is not a thing to worry about. Yes, people really get malaria there, but what you don't do—first, you don't self diagnose malaria, and secondly you don't just sit down in a grocery shop and sauy 'Huh, I better fan myself off or this malaria is really going to get me.' " (1:06:45) Interstitials *"You very clearly just took a single script and tore it into five pieces." (6:38) *Tony D of Mr. Kojo's Power Plant Security, City Planning, and Free Money Emporium (48:49) Tropes *Brian (Fuck You) *Crazy Billionaire Money *Nothing Happens *Who's That Girl? Links *Episode on Audioboom *Episode on YouTube *Film on YouTube *IMDB Category:Episodes Category: Vultures Category:Noah Lugeons Category:Heath Enwright Category:Eli Bosnick